Unrequited Pacific Love

Desire for love
to return to some safe place.
That is an illusion of security
in this labor
of reclaiming space

physical, internal, imaginative
or otherwise
create bricks from evidence
deposited in archives,
books, words and songs,
foods and dance
lands and memories,

such an arduous journey!

Yet no rest for the weary
nomad
whose genetics is to be
a wanderer,
lessons of ancestors
travelers across
floating worlds
that sunk and rose
in the fluid universe
of homelands.

Where then
can I stop to drink?
Take a rest?
In the temporal space of embraces
and loving making
that eventually ends
in the morning.
And the permanence of absence
is the only source of sanity
in this materialistic realm
that reduces magic
to physicality.

Oh, can I love
this ephemeral mystery?

Can I risk in
unfixity?

Will it ever beget a body
of my dreams
that is hooked from the sea,
manifested in prayers and dreams
for the days of peace?

Or perhaps again
I fall into
the prison of illusion?

Whoa is me...
Living in the mind
that seeks
bricks to build
rather than
courage to erode
and live underneath
fragile sandcastles,
units of infinite homes
that connects resting places
of ancestors who rode
canoes, boats, villages a-moving
to the currents of the time.
evolving, surviving
never left behind,

Oh, Self!

Let me love this truth
Let me love,
these roots.

My Love for You!

much love for my homegrown
multicultural peeps
grew up amidst intersections
of migrant and indigenous pathways
lost, found and lost again
roads that they walk and
create as they walk
becoming the love that they reclaim
in their bodies,
where different truths synthesize
to run blood in their veins
undocumented, unfixed
geneologies
that are in texts of written words
stories
music
food
lands
human bodies touching
and read with fingers
that trace carefully
like when we study books
of our friends and families
faces
like when our feet
walk ever so softly upon
the text of the land
so deeply,
we learn and come to know
so much knowledge all around us.
Blessings for the way
we are given our senses
and indulge in the wisdom
around us,
always.

to my lord: walk with me on this journey

This school
on the surface
levels
feels so
different
intentions
in the air
in the building
archi
texture
in the vibes
of people.
competition
of thought
thinking of truth
seeking truth
but what structure
of truth?
when we grow down paths
farther and farther from
you.

you who is
everywhere
pervasive
yet unseen.

our minds are
to the illusion
upon facades
of buildings
upon faces thinking
hard
upon shaking hands
clinging
to cigarette
butts
pens
and pencils
fingering
at keyboards
seeking to
fulfill the intention
of these
institutions
we are
embedded in.

And yet
you are there
mysterious
unseen

outside and
within
these paths
over beaten
over walked upon
logic of thought
frought with own mystery
to no where
but anxiety
and nervousness.

And yet
you grow
along side us.
Like the breeze
that is not felt
unrecognized
but shudders
the cold body
who has forgotten
that you offer a sweater
always
in the sunlight

that the trees
and plants
know.

but human minds
upon the path
to absence
invisible
abstract lands
where life is
growing
simplistic truth
that is
not complex

yet you are
complicated
and the sense of you
makes me cry
want to cry
amidst this place that seems
like
the no crying zone.

cause the people
are the bricks
upon building facades.
and our minds
are the grout
that makes cohesive
this thought
of building empires
of simplistic truths
concretized
that we lose our feet
to feel you.

disembodied into the sky.

we stare at the blank blue
simplistic
abstract
freedom?

o lord,
i pray that you
keep me warm
in your heaviness
sadness
that others feel
but deny

like manicured gardens
poisoned in toxins
of perfect minds

please help me
be like you
unseen

but thrive amidst
this world where you inhabit
but not only

How much I love you
but will never
grasp you
because you are more
than this building
this brick
i think.

you are this brick and more
forever
i seek to fall among
these thoughts
that build high!